One Year Ago Today...

...we were sitting in a van making nervous conversation on our way to BaVi. I couldn't tell you how long that ride lasted, which direction we were going, or what we talked about. I remember getting out of the van and walking towards the yellow building I had analyzed in so many photos. I remember feeling Logan's hand on my back and I remember feeling extremely nervous and scared. I remember walking into the last room on the left and not seeing our baby. I felt a moment of panic before one of the nannies entered a door in the rear of the building carrying our daughter. She looked so tiny, and sweaty, and bald, and mad. She was perfect. She was so scared of me. I wanted to hold her close and tell her that everything would be fine. I wanted to explain to her that we would love her more than anyone ever thought humanly possible, but I could tell she needed some time to adjust to me. I held back and let her nanny comfort her. I would hold her for a few seconds and when she started to really panic, I would let her go back to her nanny for comfort. I've never wanted to be able to communicate with another human being as badly as I wanted to let Lila know that everything would be okay.
It's amazing how quickly children adjust to new surroundings. When we got in the car and started the drive back to our hotel, Lila passed out from exhaustion. Meeting your mommy, daddy, and grandma really wears a girl out. She held tightly onto my mom's rosary case all the way back to the hotel, even while she was sleeping. The first few days she always fell asleep holding some kind of toy, like she was afraid it would be gone when she woke up. The next few weeks passed in a blur while we spent all of our time in our hotel getting to know each other. I love the memories we have from that time. I also cherish every memory Lila has given us since that time. It's amazing how much joy this tiny little girl has brought to our entire family.
I firmly believe things happen for a reason. There was a reason we decided to adopt. There was a reason we chose Vietnam. There was a reason we waited longer than we had expected. The reason ended up being simple. The reason was Lila. We were meant to be together and we're so happy that our paths came together so perfectly. We love you Lila bug! You are our everything. Happy Family Day!